The day was unlike the ones I would've call, normal. There was an air of glum around everyone. Seeing some behaving post-breakup wise, made me ponder for a moment. I even sulked along for a minute.. I asked myself, did I react the way they did after a traumatising breakup? Or was I stronger or was I weaker? I couldnt say words to console coz I knew the answer would be that nothing could bring back the sunrise after the sun had just diminished. I thought, was I that empty? Was I that blue? Truth is, I never want to remember the old me.. the one who plunged into sadness and felt nauseous whenever she saw food on the plate even when she'd not eaten. She'd eat herself inside out, not wanting to give out her hand to those who wanted to help. She wanted to just sink into the blue. Never do I want to return back into that state.. Never. I've never been much more in love with myself now. I appreciate myself and no longer do I feel like punishing myself for the way I look, I talk, I laugh, I cry. I do things to make myself much happier. Post break up is never a pot of gold. It never was and never will be. To lose on someone whom you thought was the last,is excruciating.. When the heart feels like it's squeezing itself till you feel this painful, tightness in your chest. And all you do is break down, disintegrate till you think you can not crumble further.. To those who've fallen, it's time to rise.. The sun never really disintergrate, you just looked at the other direction and chose to look at the sunset instead of the beautiful sunrise.. Cheer up.. Life was never made to make you suffer... :)




So Faz and I talked about a certain topic and I remembered those days where I felt like you had me leashed. I would obey to your every command and when you snapped, just like child, all I did was give out a little whimper. You had me. With the harsh words you've never seemed to consider, you did penetrate through this weak heart. Eventhough I thought the least was gone, but the collar remains there. Just a tug, I find myself following obediently behind...


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Zeema is so emo now...Sheeshhhhhkebabbbssss! Waddaheck! I'm happy now. Like 'hey diddle, diddle, the cat and the fiddle..the cow jumped over the moon' happy. Why? Coz I got myself a pair of awesome heels! Yeehaaaa!! Tomorrow is my interview and i got my clothes set, my shoe kept in its box and attidtude all fiesty! Im sooo gonna rock the interview!



xoxoxo,
TheGirlWhoSufferedBeingBesideYou

Note the -ed