I decided to put the previous post as a draft coz I really hate it the moment I lose control. Especially losing myself to anger coz life turns ugly when surrendered to it.
Now I'm feeling so much better.. but guilt has me wrapped all around it's pinkie finger. Coz I'm finding myself drawing nearer and nearer to the line that I,myself, had designated. I won't lie and say it hasn't been heart-warming and deliriously fun but at the corner of my mind, I'm exceptionally disappointed at myself..And I wish to build this wall to enclose that part of my mind and just say 'to heck with it'. It's been months..and right now, I'm just being happy and putting up the 'Go' sign.
Just like a book wrapped in a plastic cover.... It's tempting to read your contents..
The 2nd time. Yet I don't wish to stop..
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